What those words on yearly performance reviews REALLY mean...
  1. OUTGOING PERSONALITY - Always going out of the office
  2. GREAT PRESENTATION SKILLS - Able to bullshit
  3. GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS - Spends lots of time on phone
  4. WORK IS FIRST PRIORITY - Too ugly to get a date
  5. ACTIVE SOCIALLY - Drinks a lot
  6. INDEPENDENT WORKER - Nobody knows what s/he does
  7. QUICK THINKING - Offers plausible excuses
  8. CAREFUL THINKER - Won't make a decision
  9. USES LOGIC ON DIFFICULT JOBS - Gets someone else to do it
  10. EXPRESSES THEMSELVES WELL - Speaks English
  11. METICULOUS ATTENTION TO DETAIL - A nit picker
  12. HAS LEADERSHIP QUALITIES - Is tall or has a louder voice
  13. EXCEPTIONALLY GOOD JUDGEMENT - Lucky
  14. KEEN SENSE OF HUMOUR - Knows a lot of dirty jokes
  15. CAREER MINDED - Back stabber
  16. LOYAL - Can't get a job anywhere else
  17. PLANS FOR PROMOTIONAL/ADVANCEMENT - Buys drinks for all the boys
  18. OF GREAT VALUE TO THE ORGANIZATION - Gets to work on time
  19. RELAXED ATTITUDE - Sleeps at desk


Humor